Some updates after being MIA for a while.

FIRST: Nihongo classes are over! Which means free time. Nihongo classes are in the morning, so now that they're finished, I don't have to wake up early anymore. I can sleep at least eight hours a day~ Oh my god, I'm so happy~ *O* Though I still have to do some work for our newspaper. Japanese IV's final project is a newspaper, for which I volunteered to be Chief Editor, thus the "BUSY-編集長中" status in Y!M.

Other classes ended last month, too, but this month I still have a presentation, exams and term papers to finish. Our Directed Independent Study course's deadline's also fast approaching (the end of this month) so I must make some progress on that 30-paged academic essay.>_<;;

SECOND: I'm in for two more trips before I go home. First is the Mt. Fuji Climb with the other AIKOM students, a sort of post-graduation trip to see the sunrise on the summit of Mt. Fuji. Second is the Kyushu trip with Viet Thi, and we plan to go to Hiroshima, Yamaguchi, Nagasaki and Fukuoka in ten days.

THIRD: I'm finally going home in September. I've booked my flight on the 20th. So yeah, I can see my friends again! (^.^)/~ Terry, Mikai and Alex are, of course, going to meet me at the airport, and we will go and have lunch together or something.:D

There's so much I want to blog about, but I don't know where to start. So much have happened during the past months: Singapore and Malaysia trip, Kii Hantou trip, and then stories about AIKOM students, about my workplace, my colleagues and students in Gaba. I know I can't blog about all these due to the lack of time, but I know that if there are people who should know what's happening to me, those people would only be Terry and Famusu. I'm happy I still get to talk to Famusu, even if we're miles apart. It's really amazing how we can still talk about trivial things when I'm here, Ali's in Dubai and Mikai and Alex, even if they're in the same country, they don't get to see each other that often.

I do want to apologize to my friends whose birthdays I have neglected, though. I'm sorry if I wasn't able to greet you or post a shoutout for you. I really don't have the time to post  anything, even as little as "happy birthday" in my blog. For some reason, I've lost the enthusiasm to blog about anything.^^; Anyway, if you guys want any souvenir or whatever, I'll try my best to get them for you, if that can make up for not being able to greet you.^^;;

Pretty soon I'll be leaving Japan. But I won't say any concluding remarks first, because it's still too early to say goodbye to this country. I still have three months, and in those three months, so many things could happen.o(^.^)o But I am looking forward to coming home!\(^o^)/

...is what I lack extremely.

Today was the start of my Nihongo tutorial sessions with a volunteer from Mishop. Sure, I'm taking Nihongo classes at school, but I feel they're not enough to really improve my Japanese. I kind of feel sympathy for students of Gaba, since in a class of three (or in my case, ten) you really don't get a lot of chance to speak up. Hence, I signed up for the Nihongo private lessons.

We just talked for one hour and a half, and what my tutor said to me was I should be have more confidence in myself, and I shouldn't be too afraid of making mistakes, because if I always let myself be impeded by such things, I won't be able to communicate.

I remember myself saying the exact same words to my Algerian student, who always thinks that his English is not good, and that he can only talk in English to Japanese people. He thinks that he cannot strike a conversation with native speakers because his English is still elementary.

Self-confidence is something that I've always lacked, in whatever I do. People say I give myself too little credit. As for me, I don't want to be confident because I'm afraid of failure. Failure had, has and will always have a big impact on me. I always give my best in everything I do, but I can't say I am confident of the results. For me, if I don't carry too much confidence, then if I fail, I won't be too disappointed. I hate expecting, because if I expect too much, and things do not go as I please, then there's disappointment, which is an understatement, really. It's more of like, depression.

Why don't I just go out with Japanese friends, you ask? Why go all the trouble of signing up for private lessons when you can have "lessons" when you're out talking with friends? That just means you don't know me very well. Going out is not my thing. Sure, I go out sometimes, but that is to take a breather. I don't want to pressure myself thinking about school and serious stuff when I'm with them. Second, they're all busy. They may look oshare and everything, but they are still students of the Tokyo University. They take their studies seriously, and would spend hours in the library studying. They would even sacrifice days that would've been ideal for going out somewhere, just to study. Lastly, students who are always going out are those who love drinking. And most of you know that I DON'T DRINK. So there.

Okay, that would be enough rambling. Right now, all I want to do in my remaining months here in Japan is to improve my conversation skills, and I will just do my best to do just that, without expecting anything. My friends said that I have improved during the past few months, but I don't think it's enough. I have a goal I badly want to reach, and I must do everything I can just to be suitable for that kind of job. Oooh~ Pressure.XD

So I decided to just put my sightseeing/travel plans for my one year ten-month stay in Japan.

1. AIKOM Tsukiji tour on Saturday (Dec 15)
2. AIKOM Enoshima and Kamakura tour on January
3. AIKOM Hakone Overnight Trip on February
4. Ski Tour in Nagano Prefecture on February
5. Trip to Sapporo for the Yuki Matsuri on February
6. AIKOM 5-day trip around Kansai region on May-June
7. Trip to Yamaguchi on summer vacation

The italicized ones are those that aren't definite yet. The ski tour's selection of participants will be through a lottery. The trip to Sapporo, Hokkaido costs around 50,000 if I won't go by travel package. I don't know how much the trip to Yamaguchi will be, but I've been asked by my tutor if I want to come with her so, of course, I'd like to come. Yamaguchi prefecture's south of the Honshu island. It may not be Okinawa, but still, it's like being there anyway. My tutor's place is like near the shore from where you can practically see South Korea. Beach, yay~

I hope I can save enough money for these trips. I'd like to travel as much as possible while I am here in Japan, since the opportunity's here now.=^-^=

Okay, today's the day my phone's supposed to be sent to our house, and as usual, I am so paranoid whether it'll be sent at all or not. I wasn't worrying when it was still in Japan, but when it gets there in the Philippines? Ooooh... I don't know.x__x;;

And yes, I can trace the package but only until it was dispatched from the Tokyo Central Post Office, or some place like that. I can only guess if my package has arrived in the Philippines. My country's technology is still not that advanced to even inform me whether my package is safe or not.T--T

As much as I don't like worrying about little stuff I should not be worrying about, I can't help it. Paranoia is like my middle name.XO

Gar. My class starts at 1pm. Good luck to all you enrolling in UP! This is the last semester for some, and for the others? Hmm...^^;;

Today is November 1. If I were in the Philippines, I'd be sleeping all day (because our dead relatives are buried far in the northern part of Luzon). But I attended three straight classes today, with barely thirty minutes for lunch and ten minutes to transfer from one building to another. After riding the train for around twenty minutes and the bicycle for another thirty minutes, I got home, cooked food, and opened my Nihongo books to study for tomorrow's lessons.

I've been living like that here in Japan for one month now. Everyday it's dorm-school, school-dorm, with just weekend trips to Kichijoji to meet Klao, and sometimes first time trips to other places like Akihabara and Nihonbashi, but that was because it was necessary. I needed to buy a denshi jishou, and send my payment for the plane ticket to my aunt.

Sometimes, I wish I were back in the Philippines, where I should be enjoying my sem break with everyone else by sleeping all day and meeting Terry almost everyday. But of course, that's just because I miss home. I do not intend to waste this opportunity to  spend one whole year in the land I've been dreaming to visit ever since I don't know, because it might not happen again. Besides, I made a promise that I will do my best here, so I must keep that promise. No matter what.

One month down. Eleven more to go, and many places to visit. Whee~